Elegant buffet service for four

Breakfasts and Brunches
Published 1966
Original price unknown
Found in a used book store

No whimsy here, Sunset's guide to morning food is so completely down-to-earth and no-nonsense that there aren't even color photos. Breakfast is serious business. So serious, in fact, that the introduction breaks down the basics of the basics: "The first section of this books gives us 78 selected recipes for breakfast and brunches. It includes unusual fruit and juice ideas, revolutionary material on egg cookery, and a variety of pancake, waffle, and bread recipes. "

How much more clear can they be, they mean business here, people. Banana Buttermilk business. Tarragon Egg business. Sour Cream Waffles with Shrimp and Mushrooms business.

Revolutionary business, too, this matter of cooking eggs. "If you actually boil an egg," the book tells us, "you are courting such disasters as rubbery whites, green yolks, cracked and leakign shells, waterlogged and lopsided eggs." Continuing on is an 8-paragraph set of instruction for soft-cooking, hard-cooking, and shelling eggs. Further in, how not to turn fried eggs into leather, the golden liquid-to-egg ratio for the perfect scramble, and a list of unusual omelet fillings:

• Artichokes
• Avocado and Ripe Tomato
• Gorgonzola and Black Walnuts
• Green Chili and Jack Cheese
• Sherried Shrimp
• Sausage
• Smoked Salmon and Cream Cheese

Oh weird.


The second half of the book contains menus and suggestions for brunches for 2-12 people. Elegant Garden Brunches full of chilled fruits and slided meats, Beach Brunches with pineapples and Deviled Eggs, Corned Beef Brunch, Pancake Brunch, After-The-Holidays Brunch... No occasion is left unbrunched. Not a single one.


And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... Velvet Hot Cakes!

Tea for Two, and Brisket, too

Betty Crocker's New Dinner for Two Cookbook
Published 1964
Original price unknown
Found in a used book store



"Dear friend,
If you are a bride, a business girl, career wife, or a mother whose children are away from home - this book is for you."

Definitely for the child-free set, New Dinner for Two will delight the modern homemaker and her husband with treats like Double-deck Potatoes and Carrots, Boiled Dinner (a brisket and cabbage concoction), Walnut Cheese Bon-Bons, and Creamed Onions. All perfectly portioned for a petite party. Most menus come complete with a timetable, to make the most of prep-time, and there are handy marketing tips in the back. So sweet.

Sprinkled throughout are pennywise tidbits such as, "select canned goods economically. For example, you'll want top-quality peas to serve buttered for dinner but third-quality peas will make a delicious soup." Oh so true. Frankly Thrifty, the chapter devoted to cooking on a budget (or ostensibly for retirees and those whose children are away at U-Mass) shows ways to tighten the food budget with ease and just a pinch of imagination. Make pancakes with Bisquick as noted on page 91? Novel! Re-use uneaten vegetables in a casserole? Bravo!

Empty nesters are given special consideration in the chapter So You're Back to Two, with the special appendices Good Foods for Less Active Twosomes and Sunset Years Guide. The sage advice for seniors includes gems such as:

• Avoid foods containing too much roughage, such as cabbage, celery, and whole kernel corn.
• Include easy-to-eat foods like gelatin salads, souffles, and mashed potatoes.
• Contrast crisp-textured foods like toast points, crackers, and chow-mein noodles with softer foods in a menu

Economic and ageist matters aside, this cookbook is full of eerily-toned photographs and amazing illustrations - which themselves are well worth the cover price.



Here is a delightful recipe for Dinette Cake:
1 1/2 cups cake flour
1 cup sugar
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/3 cup shortening
2/3 cup milk
1 tsp flavoring
1 egg

Heat oven to 350. Stir flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt together. Add shortening, milk, and flavoring. [note: recipe does not specify what flavor.] Beat for 2 minutes at medium speed. Add egg. Beat 2 more minutes. Pour into greased and floured 9x9 pan and bake 30-35 minutes.

Easy Penuce Icing
1/2 cup butter
2/3 cups brown sugar (packed)
3 tbsp milk
1 to 1 1/2 cups confectioner's sugar

Melt butter in saucepan. Stir in brown sugar. Boil and stir over low heat, 2 minutes. Stir in milk. Bring to boil, stirring constantly. Cool to lukewarm. Gradually stir in confectioner's sugar. Place pan in ice water and stir until thick enough to spread.
Frosts a 9" Dinette Cake.
Enjoy!

And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... Quickie French Tarts!

Lipton Kitchens, working hard for you

Soup Lovers Guide to Lipton
Home-cooked Taste the New Mix Way
Publishing date unknown
Original price unknown
Gift from Della Terious

A teeny tiny tome, 3 inches square, dedicated to the delights of Lipton soup mix. All the usual New and Improved ideas are here - stir onion soup mix into sour cream for an easy and delightful Onion Dip, add tomato sauce to pea soup and get Tomato Pea Soup, simmer rice with chicken noodle mix and presto! Chicken Rice Pilaf! Just add pimento and you'll have Arroz con Pollo!

Ever wonder where Shag got the inspiration for his fonts? Now you know.



And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... California Dip!

Good, wholesome nourishment

Betty Crocker's Good and Easy Cookbook
Published 1954
Original price unknown
Found in a used book store in Seattle

Football may now have the twelfth man, but way back in the 50's Betty Crocker gave us The Fourth Meal - that between meal snack that made everything better. First named in Betty Crocker's Good and Easy Cookbook, the idea of the 4th meal is just one of many mealtime innovations. But like the best of days, this book starts with breakfast.

Of the many ways to dress up breakfast cereal is the Teddy Bear in a Bowl; half a pear on Wheaties with a raisin face and banana ears. Or make a Chocolate Cereal Sundae, "pour chocolate milk over crispy corn puffs. No sugar is needed." For Lightning Quick Waffles, "just follow the directions on the Bisquick package."

So, wait, whatnow? People needed to be told this?

Lunch is where the fun really begins - from stay-at-home lunches to be best midmeal totes is discussed. Did you know that for the man,a metal lunchbox is the way to go because "it can be scalded frequently" and for a fine young lady, a lunchbox "should be attractive so that carrying it doesn't seem a burden"? No matter what you put it in, a 4-star lunch is nourishing, appetizing, tasty, and planned for carrying. May I recommend the following selections: Deviled Frankfurter Salad Sandwich, Miroton of Seafood, a handful of radishes, and Fruit-Marshmallow Cream. With a Prune Malted Milk on the side.

Furthermore, the ultimate value of soups and corned beef hash in cans is espoused, and lunchtime mainstay, the Green and Gold Salad is deconstructed into it's basic parts - green peas, cubed American cheese, and yellow squeezy mustard.

The Dinner chapter gets even more delectable with tasty and filing treats like Beef Birds (thinly sliced flank steak rolled around a pickle slice and fried in hot fat), Crispy Fried Pike (fish dredged in sour milk and Bisquick), Barbecued Trout, Beet Horseradish Mold, and Tuck-A-Way Meatloaf (meatloaf with whole hard-boiled eggs hidden inside). This is truly Housewife Cuisine at it's finest. There's even a sub-heading for how best to use leftovers. Extra bacon can go into soup as a garnish and you know all that extraneous veal you've got just sitting around? Well, pop it right in some BBQ sauce and serve it on a bun.

Finally, the Fourth Meal, The Snack! According to the introduction, "for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, you eat the things you think you should eat. But in between, you can eat the things you like... We hope these suggestions will add to the enjoyment of life in your home - for every member of your family and for the friends who drop in to share your hospitality." Serving nibbles such as Angels on Horseback (oysters wrapped in bacon), Hollywood Dunk (deviled ham, horseradish, and whipped cream), and Forgotten Meringues (leave egg whites in the oven overnight) all but guarantees your guests will know ex-actly what you think of them.

Here's a dinnertime treat for all the ages:
Full of Baloney
2 cups cubed raw potatoes
1 1/2 cups cut-up bologna
2 tbsp minced green pepper
6 tbsp Gold Metal Flour
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
3 tbsp butter
2 cups milk

Heat oven to 350. Arrange potatoes, bologna, green pepper, flour, and seasonings in layers in 1 1/2quart baking dish, dotting each layer with butter. Pour milk over and bake 1 hour.


And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... Three in One Tossed Salad!

Serve While Blazing

Cooking with Wine and High Spirits
A Lighthearted Approach to the Art of Gourmet Cooking
by Rebecca Caruba
Published 1963
Original price unknown
Found in a used book store in Minneapolis

High Spirits are not ghosts. I'd hoped they were ghosts. But instead, they're just plain ol' boozeahol.

Aside from the recipes, which for the most part look surprisingly delicious, this book is full of great boozy factoids. Did you know that champagne can come in 8-, 12-, 16-, and 20-quart bottles? Yup! They're called Methuselah, Salmanazar, Balthazar, Nebuchadnezzar, respectively. How cool would it be to show up at a swank restaurant and order a Salmanazar of Tattinger. Just say that, Salmanazar of Tattinger - Salmanazar of Tattinger - Salmanazar of Tattinger.

Because you and your friends can easily drink 104 glasses of champagne in an evening.

The recipes in this book rely heavily on wine, port, and sherry (aka wine, wine, and more wine) but there are a few boozy greats. One could make a pretty fine meal of Scotch Lobster, Beer Bread, and Pumpkin Rum Souffle. Most appetizers and desserts are served aflame, which is a super double-bonus.

Chartreuse Pancakes
Batter:
1 cup all-purpose flour
2 eggs
2 tbsp lemon juice
1 tbsp butter
3/4 cup beer
1/4 cup plus 2 tbsp green chartreuse

Mix all batter ingredients in a small bowl, stirring briskly to incorporate. Set aside to mellow for about an hour. When ready to prepare, heat 1 tsp butter in a small frying pan and add approximately 3 tbsp batter to make a light pancake. Fry 1 minute on each side, remove from pan and set aside. Repeat with remaining batter (makes 12 pancakes).

Cream:
2 tbsp melted butter
2 tbsp lemon juice
2 tbsp yellow chartreuse
1/4 cup granulated sugar

Mix together the cream ingredients and brush onto each pancake. Roll and place side by side on a heat-proof platter. Immediately before serving, reheat by placing the platter under a broiler for 2 minutes. Flame at the table.

To flame: Place 1/4 cup green chartreuse in a flaming ladle and ignite by tipping it toward the flame of a candle. Pour immediately over the pancakes, which in turn will ignite.
Mix


And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... Fudge Rounds!

Afflicted with The Ulcer Temprament

Good Food for Bad Stomachs
500 Delicious and Nutritious Recipes for Sufferers from Ulcers and Other Digestive Disturbances
by Sara M Jordan, MD
Published 1951
Original price unknown
Purchased at a Goodwill in Seattle - $1.99

Quite possibly the best passage ever is this relevation of the peptic ulcer-suffering forward-writer's newfound gastronomical joy and cultural mind expansion:
"One night I had dinner with Dr. Jordan and, in the process of demonstrating how a model patient goes about eating properly, mentioned that I was considering compote of fruit for dessert, a dish that I had pretty much settled on as a standard order, if, in my gustatory listlessness, I bothered with dessert at all. To my astonishment, Dr. Jordan suggested that i have a Meringue Glacee. Now meringue glacee has a French name, which is bad, and it is an ornamental concoction, which is bad. It sounds and looks evil."

Ooooh shudder! I guess the anti-cheese-eating surrender monkeyFrench sentiment has been a pastime of ours since the get-go. Anyway, the forward-writer continues:
"The meringue constituents of it look, in fact, almost as evil as a couple of macaroons, which are made of almonds, which are oily, and hence evil. Dr. Jordan revealed that meringue is made from the whites of eggs and sugar - no harm in the barrel of it. I had meringue glacee that evening, and although I regard it as essentially a sissy proposition and nothing for a full-grown man to lose his head over, I have it now and then when I'm in the ulcer victim's nearest approach to a devil-may-care mood."

OK then. So, a good ulcer patient only eats the boringest of borings, the French are evil, and desserts that look nice are only for girly-men. And with that, all ulcer-sufferers must eat nothing but cream cheese, cream of wheat, and cardboard.

Oh! Wait! They don't! Dr. Jordan will lead the willing through the "dietetic wilderness" and deliver them unto vast Table Of [pureed, non-fried, non-raw, non-spiced, non-acidic] Plenty. Those suffering from ulcers and other gastromic ills can indulge in and enjoy Calves Brains Au Beurre, Poached Eggs in Aspic, Fillet of Flounder with Creamed Shad Roe, and Rich Junket with Strawberry Syrup. And who wouldn't want to eat all that? Good Food for Bad Stomachs also dresses up the happy-tummy classics, with newfangled recipes for drip coffee, cream of wheat souflee, and butter noodles.

Calves' Liver in Sour Cream
1 pound calves' liver
butter
1 onion, sliced
2 sprigs parsley, chopped
1 1/2 cups stock,
1 tbsp butter
1/2 teaspoon soy sauce
3/4 cup sour cream
salt

Wipe liver with damp cloth, tie in presentable shape, then rub with salt. Put in a deep pan with onion, parsley, and stock. Cover closely and bake in moderate oven (350) 1 1/2 hours. Uncover, spread with butter, and continue baking 30 minutes, basting several times. At the end of this time, all but 2 or 3 tablespoons of the cooking liquid should be absorbed. Mix soy sauce and 1/4 teaspoon of salt with the sour cream and pour over the liver. Stir well, scraping up and mixing with the sauce any bits of solidified juices that may adhere to the pan. Put pan over direct heat and let cream bubble up for a minute or two. Place liver on hot serving platter, remove strings, and strain the sauce over all. Serves 4.

There, now doesn't that make you feel better?

You'll have a Grenwich Village art show in no time!

Birthdays and Celebrations
Better Homes and Gardens Creative Cooking Library
Published 1963
Original price unknown
Found in a used book store

ZOMG! Crazycakes with neon frostings! Totally un-PC party ideas! Recipes like "Ad-lib burgers!" This the best book evAr... Lookit! They have neon frosting, I'm neon frosting, it's a match made in the ultimatey ultimate of heaven!

This cookbook is all about theme parties; how to throw them, what to serve, how to dress the table, how wonderful they were, but here's a little secret - themed parties never ever work. From the dawn of time, every single themed event has been a dismal failure for everyone except the party planners. Socrates' Hemlock Punch Soiree, The Last Supper, The Parisian Horsemeat Banquet of 1855 - not a single one of 'em ended well, if you catch my drift.

In fact, the parties described in this book would only work in the exquisitely groomed cul-de-sac of my mind. From the opening page's gumdrop-emblazoned Children's Birthday cakes to the Silver Anniversary Buffet at the end, each and every recipe and theme idea will shock and delight. In all the wrong ways.

Some day, I'll have a Valentines Day party, and I'll subject my friends to the wonder that is Valentine Ring Around.
Mash together one 12-ounce carton cream-style cottage cheese and two 3-ounce packages cream cheese till well blended. Soften 1 teaspoon unflavored gelatin in 1/4 cup cold water; dissolve over hot water; add 1/4 tsp salt. Stir gelatin mixture into cheese mixture.
Add 1 cup seedless green grapes, 1/2 cup broken pecans, 2 tablespoons chopped chives. Fold in 1/2 cup whipping cream, whipped. Turn into a 5-cup ring mold, chill until firm. Unmold. Top with gelatin heart cutouts.

Gelatin Heart Cutouts
Dissolve 1 package cherry or strawberry or raspberry gelatin in 2 cups hot water. Pour into a shallow baking dish - gelatin should be less than 1/2 inch deep. Chill firm. Cut hearts with cooky [sic] cutter.

Yup, I'll make that for all my friends and then I won't have to worry about having friends ever again. It'll be just like that nice party Al Capone threw for Bugs Moran. Seriously, chives?




And the Dirtiest Recipe Name Award goes to... Swedish Spritz!